Margo Denay Bereska - Weaving Quantum Core Essence Into Your Awareness
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Sacred Union, Marriage and Relationships

Sacred Union, Marriage and Relationships
What is love? What is not love? That is a BIG question we search for in life.
One truth I do claim to know, for certain, is that we do
ALL know love. 

Love is our essence.

To quote from one of my favourite stories:
Piglet: “How do you spell 'love'?"
Pooh: "You don't spell it... you feel it."
Love cannot be spelt, it can only be felt.
We can talk about it until we are green in the heart and none of the words matter. Love is simply felt. Soul deep. Beyond words. It’s like when you sit on a beach, or anywhere at sunset, and everyone is watching the same beauty, taking pictures as we connect to the same feeling that requires no language.
I have given intuitive readings to hundreds of people covering relationships; it’s a very important topic for anyone who sits at the divine table. Over time, these insights have given me some wonderful answers about this topic, and they have also confirmed so many of my own beliefs about when to stay and when to go. 
These days we know that divorce is common, very common. An overwhelming percentage of marriages end because of adultery. This trend has given us so much to question about monogamy, commitment, trust and the words we say at the altar; we’re led to question those vows.  
I have often wondered if we are truly meant for one person forever. One lifetime is not a long time in the truth of the infinite perspective, but within one’s life, forever is a very, very long time!  When two people meet and are in complete alignment, it’s guaranteed that both will go through many changes along the span of life.
At some point I personally really wanted to believe that, yes, we are meant to fall madly in love and stick through the hard times after the initial romance dies off. After all, this is the happily-ever-after ending that we have been programmed to believe in.
I’ve worked on countless cases of couples and I have seen various stories unfold, often with terrifying endings, and few that ended peacefully. So I have to ask myself (and many times answer that question from others), what on earth happened? Are we really meant to be with one person?
I like to ask from the perspective of divine truth, and since I allow myself to communicate with angelic beings I have come to know that angels never lie. I have also come to understand so much about the purpose of soul-mates, twin-flames, lovers, flings, flirts and far-sighted passionate romances.
Recently I gave a reading to an amazing man who walked in like an angel through the door and sat, slightly wounded, in front of me. When I say amazing, I mean someone who walked with an honest confidence, who stood tall in humble light, with a gentle and yet strong demeanour, all while carrying an integrity that is hard to explain. As I looked into his soul and the questions of his soul, it was clear as day that this man was on a mission. I see this sort of thing often in my work, as I attract many powerful light-worker, angel types that need to be reminded of who they are and why they have come. This man, an artist to the soul, has been working for a bank in order support a life-style for himself and his partner, as well as for a few members of his family. Seeing this man support a house, a marriage, a busy career and other people, as well as several dogs to make the ride smoother, I could see that he was carrying a lot of burden – a heavy load indeed. On top of that, his employer asked him to pull mortgages from families about to move into their new homes. In the midst of this turmoil, I saw a highly spiritual master with a genuine heart and a warm and loving soul. He had a loud calling that if I could put it into words would be God’s proverbial trumpet calling him in a completely different direction. He was torn – he was hearing this call to some degree, yet life was keeping him still, in a very acceptable safety net. The truth was that he was doing some undercover work in the bank. Although he felt terrible and overly responsible for being the bearer of bad news, what I could clearly see was that this was also a divine assignment. He was gentle and wise, and therefore able to usher a peaceful message along with such bad news as the loss of a material safety that so many of us count on to feel safe and grounded - the home. Feeling the pull between being in service in an institution, and hearing the call of the mystic healer puts you at a choice point; society and partners do not always accept this choice.
The point of this blog is that I write from a perspective with divine response, and have an answer that many of you may be seeking. So, when is love meant to be endured, and when is a relationship meant to end?
Obviously this cannot be answered in a general sense since every single person is completely unique - as is every single relationship. Each situation presents a completely different set of stories as a sequence of life incidents; this makes up a reality of patterning that contributes to the unique scenario.
Recently, for example, I saw a couple that most people would call the Angelina-Brad combo that many aspire to emulate - a couple constantly under high pressure within the public eye bombarded by the press and paparazzi. Under pressured circumstances that can be extremely hard to maintain, they endure a mass of opinions, truths and constant viewing. But, they represent a relationship where both parties seem to be able to continuously support each other and get through the tough times, holding each other strong no matter what. The couple that I saw for a simple tune-up is a shining version of what I consider a union that many people dream about. They have worked at it. Both of them have come from broken homes involving alcohol addictions combined with abuse and heavy loads of responsibility. They have come together as young adults, supporting each other, committed, and have risen above and beyond. Independently and together, they have created enough healing and mutual counseling to re-evaluate life’s importance. They have both found strength in forgiveness and soul work, and have created releases by changing their patterns of behaviour. Now in a very loving union, the couple has created a wonderful family unit with two sensitive, loving children - children raised by a team working with one another in equal support and respecting their mutual gifts and talents. Nothing is perfect, but this would be the closest I have seen. This is what I refer to as a real, sacred union.
So why are there so many broken, unhealthy, non-supportive, co-dependent, relationships? How do you know when to stay and when to walk? Let’s simplify and get clear.
First and foremost I will tell you that no relationship is in any way divine or sacred when any of the three A’s are present. These are ALL deal breakers no matter what:
Abuse, Adultery and Addictions.

This needs no explanation but to keep it clear and simple lets cover the basics and get straight to the point.
1.   Abuse: anytime ANYONE is abusing you in any way, including physical abuse, mental abuse or verbal abuse, this is NOT okay.  No one ever deserves this and when we allow it, nobody wins. It is not okay to permit this and it is not justifiable - ever.
2.   Adultery: when you have made a vow to be committed to someone, you create an energy of trust that becomes the strength of the union. Of course you will, at some point, feel attracted to other people – this is human nature. If you are in a committed relationship without a verbal agreement of being in an open relationship, and if your partner is cheating on you, this is a very valid reason to walk. When it is a secret, this energy will break even if the other person finds out or not. Things will eventually fall apart. I have seen this many times. Dishonest energy is a deal breaker - every time. If you can stick it out and bond again, becoming even stronger, then good for you, but usually, once a cheater - always a cheater. And trust, we know, is crucial.
3.   Addictions: the truth is that when someone has an addiction to an altering substance or a defeating habit there is a great potential for filling relationship holes with poisonous glue. When addiction is affecting communication, or drowning out the severity of any issue, the band-aid will eventually be ripped off, and it is going to hurt.  This is a guarantee that will repeat itself over and over.
Sadly, a good percentage of these issues are present in most relationships. Think about it, it’s true. Often partners support each other’s weaknesses by allowing these behaviours to continue, or on the other hand, enable the addiction by becoming stuck in co-dependency by feeding an unbalanced need. This happens in two ways:
1.   Justifying them, by finding reason, repetitively.
2.   Trying to work through them over and over, often settling for something unhealthy because it becomes comfortable and safe - expected and endured. Doing the same thing and expecting different results is habitual, and they say is insane. So tap into your sanity, which is inevitably more powerful; no more expectations of a different result.
Let me make this very clear, these are not signs of strength, but signs of imbalance.
The angels affirm this loudly: the truth is, that over and over, when someone is being hurt by abuse, or is being betrayed by adultery, or is being weakened by addictions, THERE IS NO EXCUSE. This is NOT okay and there is no reason to endure this pain-filled drama and suffering. When you are allowing this it is not sacred or divine, and it is not love. You may be seeing the truth, which is the potential for great love, but at a time when one or both partners are not in alignment with this truth. This situation is actually an imbalance that you are permitting because something is amiss with in your own self-projection and within your own self-love. No one can heal this but you. You may need help of course, but you have to initiate the change by saying yes to balance and no to abuse, and by taking the action steps required to get out of it. You need to heal your own patterns of behaviour by no longer allowing something that is harming your soul and your spirit.
If someone is causing you suffering, intentionally or not, it is because they are overflowing with suffering, and they need help. It is not necessarily your job to be that person. You choose to allow them to keep you in suffering or you teach them that it is not okay. Then it is up to them to prove by means of action that that is no longer their intention.
Personally speaking, I do agree that every single relationship is a teacher of lessons we need to learn and that even the strongest person can get caught up in something unhealthy. Many loving souls end up trying to “save” someone by seeing the true light that they are and jumping into the tornado of addictive, abusive tendencies to show someone the way out. The thing is that this only leads to two possible scenarios:
1     The person changes slightly and you no longer feel needed so you end up feeling abandoned. Your job is over, so you repeat the cycle of “fixing” only to end up drained, tired and hopeless.
2     The person becomes dependent on you to continuously be loving, insightful and full of love, and selfishly continues the pattern as you sit hopeful that one day, magically this person will see the light and give you back a portion of what you offer.
If this sounds familiar please give yourself a very strong shake of the head - see the deep truth. You are not helping yourself, or the person you claim to love by allowing them to play small. You are actually hurting yourself in the process and setting yourself up for major disappointment. If this person continues these patterns, essentially you are beating your head against the same brick wall. Consider a twelve-step program and get your self some worthy help. The minute you commit to yourself and take action on changing your patterns the universe will support you fully by showing you better options. I promise.
Since we are cutting to the chase here, this cycle goes back to one thing: you need to reclaim your power as an individual who needs to be honoured, respected and worthy of a relationship that holds you in your own potential; you need to seek the healing needed from childhood trauma and do the uncomfortable work; give yourself the power and the permission to heal the broken parts of you so that when someone amazing comes through the door, you can identify it and let yourself receive sacred love, rather then create self-sabotage by pushing good people out.
I wanted to make those three situations clear because they are far too common, and while we continue to allow them, the world will stay broken. You have a responsibility to yourself to honour something healthy, supportive and playful in life. Do you agree?
Now I am also going to speak of something that I have learned is another great and justifiable reason to end a relationship. This one seems harder for some reason because sometimes there is lots of love, with none of the three A’s interfering at all. I am also seeing this happen quite often these days and this is another issue I really wanted to write about.
You can feel a lot of love for someone, but human love is not always “enough.”
We are passing through some major changes on this planet and coming into something that has been talked about for ages. There are souls being called, alright. I know, because I was one of them. I heard the call, and I answered. A small part of this call was typing this blog. I am going to continue this discussion on what I am calling “Spiritual Squishing.”
What is this?
This is what is happening on many levels when one of the two partners is feeling the call or hearing the trumpet and being asked by spirit to step up into bigger shoes - just as I described earlier with the man at the bank.
When one person feels responsible for holding up the relationship, there is a lot of responsibility and fear that comes with being the “support beam.” Holding the base in the ground and the head and arms on the roof is a lot of weight. When the trumpet calls you in a totally different direction, and you walk away, the beam without support points to something crumbling.
From a personal perspective I get this: I walked from stability, or from an illusion of stability, to follow my heart and I did have to let things crumble. So, in identifying with many people hearing this call, I know it is tough. Can you hear the call and stay? Or do you need to go? I know that the soul cannot be ignored. That is what causes ALL imbalances and ALL illness.
(Truth note: this is also caused by our poisoned food and water supply, but I won’t get started on that today.)
Now, with so many spiritual light-workers needed right now, the alarm bells are going off – loudly! We have been given this gift to hold immense amounts of love, compassion, understanding and energy. We have also been given assignments to share that love with many, many people. Not all partners can handle this.  People that are not evolved in higher thinking tend to pull us down and keep us stuck, by sucking out whatever they can - like a spider catching a butterfly, it’s natural, but doesn’t always seem fair.
So this is where the one being called has to get very quiet and listen.
Do you know that a huge number of the planet’s population are light workers? And that many are groggy, tired and sleeping behind desks of security and systematical paper work?
This is also where one has to come to terms with the mission. You will have to ask yourself about this, and eventually be very honest with your partner and see if they are able to support you in encouraging you to go forward, thereby amplifying your gifts on offer to the world. Sometimes I see the other person so fearful of seeing their partner as their beam of light that they are energetically held by them there. This is where the beam MUST become a walking lighthouse. If the other person insists on staying stuck, guess who is going to feel the pain? Surely both, but mostly the one who is ignoring the call.
When in a union of marriage, when your soul calls for expansion, if your partner does not hold you in your highest potential then the relationship has served its purpose; it is no longer sacred. Although all relationships are sacred in truthful essence, a thriving sacred union supports both parties through all cycles of growth, and each partner needs to be able and willing to fill the tank when it is empty. As well, a sacred union says, “Go. Love. Create. Live. Accomplish. Do it with me, or do it without me if you must. I cannot keep you here chained, holding up walls and floors. Go, and be the love that you need to be.” A soul knows that in truth we cannot hold someone stagnant. Ego will be possessive, hurt, angry, and even jealous.
Because spirit knows that love is infinite when coming from a higher perspective, this act of separation can be done peacefully, and in harmony and understanding. More often than not we are meant to cross paths, and then to come to a crossroads, or see the fork in the road ahead. We are here to spoon out some happiness and remind each other who we truly are. It is okay to walk separate ways so that each one can truly manifest what they really want - often very different things.
The vows were said in the moment, and at that time it was true. In no way is it a violation of any divine law to break these vows. It is simply a truth that the soul needs to honour.
Now… go be the light if you must, and set the person free who needs to go and be.
Walls will crumble and it will not be easy.
But it will be worth it. Because no matter what, the soul always knows.
Hear the call and walk towards it. Have gratitude for the path behind you, and be propelled with excitement for the mystery in front of you.
“Since I cannot be free with you,I must then be free without you. After all, there is no separation. Simply an ending of what has for so long been. Until we meet again”
Your soul.

The one that holds you in the sky
in golden light
who hears your voice wrapped in gentle wind 
listening to messages sent by your heart

The one that plays back your notes
is harmonic sequence,who knows your strength without fear or intimidation
who strengthens your weaknesses by seeing them as strengths

Who puts a hand on your fragile heart 
when out of synch reminds you of your own beats

Who walks with you even when you can not see 
simply allowing

                                                                        That is what we wish for you
                                                                                        *   *   *

Needing a romance reading? Perhaps you need to release an old vow, a contract or, maybe a wisp of some divine breath to assist you in blowing out the match? 

Your own soul is always calling in a sacred union, and your angels are with you to help you to release and receive. Time now, to let the tie come undone. 
What is emptied can only be filled.

Margo Bereska



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