My chick pad smells like garlic butter. One of my most cherished aromas fill my brain receptors,triggering warm memory's, as a familiar waft of seafood linger in my vortex. Indulged in the pleasures of the human senses,I sip slowly a perfectly measured 6oz glass of organic Chardonnay. Looking out at one of my most favourite views in the world. Whistler mountain in front of me and to the left a brilliant, bold creation of Mount Edith Cavell holding within her Angel glacier. Strong and sturdy. Blooming pink and white lily's seem to dance beside me,as precious treasures within floral aromas that surround me. As if they cancel out the guilt I have for the little sea creatures I have just consumed. When too many thoughts are in my head, I transform them into a meal, a painting, a dance, or a meal. Lately, as guided- a blog.
I picked out a lobster the other day to feed a craving, as I set it in water with some quartz crystals which I often do with food to bring in some extra life force. Her eyes starred, as if looking up at me, saying "You know something. Are you sure you want to eat me?" I hoped that perhaps, with some crystals and good intentions, that I could purify any unbalanced energy she may have held on to as I connected to how it must have felt when it was in a trap. Sure enough as I went to clean this lobster out, I noticed hundreds of tiny eggs within each perfected cell of this acceptingly delicious crustacean.
Geesh now I feel worse!
I know that we think as humans that we are the only ones with consciousness but what I really know is that everything is consciousness, every living organism has an awareness as well as purpose here, the more aware I become to these truths the more I question my choices in so many area's of my life, including my diet.
The one thing I also know is that guilt, just like fear and shame are a complete waste of energy, as well such emotions pose as major blocks to our true essence, which is to feel good. I laugh at myself lovingly as I eat slowly, enjoying every second of doing so alone. The buzz on the streets is loud, and since I can remember I have no problem being in my own company.In this awareness so loud lately, I figure this is probably one of my last lobsters. So I make peace with her, and just like when I quit smoking, I throughly enjoyed every single exhale and inhale, right down to the filter. Putting out the cherry with passion and straight up intention to never be addicted again.
Spanish guitar plays away as I type at the keys, admiring my romantic nature. I am nostalgic for certain, no need to deny that. Tomorrow I give a fair months notice to move out of my chick pad. I have stepped in and out of question with this decision for way too long. When it comes to this place I have been in for roughly two years, I do feel a little torn I admit. Not only does it have two patio's with million dollar views, a whole lot of soul essence and a fabulous downtown location, it has been the place I know my angels picked for me. With great reason.
After travelling and living in Mexico and Egypt for ten years, I had wondered like a free gypsy listening to the wind as it took me on soulful journeys all over the place.Eventually you become restless and seek some sort of root. I knew I needed to stay still for a while and figure somethings out. Well the last few years that is exactly what I have been doing. Besides pulling in a huge, giant and divine vortex of golden light to anchor into the land below me, I know I have completed what I have landed here to do. That feels good. Actually.
Of course my ego hates this choice of change, she would just love to keep me here stuck, in this powerful bubble of beautiful of truth-filled deceit. Ego hates change.
I work with my windows wide open, because I have no fear anymore of letting anyone in. Yes I am a powerful psychic healer, I am also human and have tough times just like everyone else. Speaking to the angels and working in the realms of higher consciousness everyday, really helps me see the bigger picture behind all of the scenes we create. Gives me strength to follow my passions and speak my voice, to keep going, because in the school of Earth life which can be tough. I know that I am a grand spirit, here as a human apprentice.
Last month I was in a major state of depression coming to terms with some truths that my soul did not want to accept. I did not want to leave my chick pad at all, nor did I want to go out with friends,or even pick up a paint brush or a pen to express myself.Yup I have been there too. I appreciate depression much more than I would have, before experiencing this nasty wave spell of emotion.I know better to cover it up with pills, I ride it out just like a wave it the ocean.Once you are down, you can only go up.The trick is in finding the balance.
I do have the opportunity to share with people, wonderful insights that come from higher sources of wisdom. Happy that I do this as as my job, so I am blessed that I am able to receive these insights as well and usually act on them.Depression is a very,very normal part of living. When we feel detached from our innate sense of love and belonging, this state is usually triggered my some life incident that showed us the existence of our own denial. A rejection, a heart break or major disappointment. One thing I have learned is the balance of attachment,as I have consciously intended to not become overly attached to people ,places or things. Because in truth all of those things can leave you, and in the end all you have is yourself, to create a new reality.This may include the coolest pad, or place you have manifested to be in, with lots of light, gorgeous views and a major vortex to create in but you can attract things and places anywhere. If that is what is important.
I am very thank-full for some amazing soulmate friends that I have who noticed me sinking into the quicksand and set up a "walk the oracle" mission. Amazing women who pulled me out from out of the duvet covers of exhaustion, back into my daily uphill climb to oversee the townsite and all it's glory. I shook my head a bit as a friend said to me
"We need you out in the world, Margo. You help everyone. So we need to help you"
My heart became warmer as we climbed uphill, warmer? Okay hot . I though I might die as I walked up a hill that I could usually sprint in less than five minutes. This is why it is so crucial to have good friends, who know you to the bone.Even if you just met them. These are your soul mates.
Spirit also has a divine language, when you know how to listen. So as I am sitting in my bed not less that six weeks ago, my angels showed me myself in two profound visions. One was that I was in fact in a bubble, a very powerful "learning bubble" it seemed contained in my room and within a meter of me one either side. Thats a small bubble of expansion! I realized. Suddenly I saw a beam of intense colourful light come right down into the centre of my core. Then, this light amplified outward, like a booming, widening expansive light. I saw it pass the rivers beyond the tracks, passing outside of town, then I saw it expand further, then further back reaching to the ocean.As I clearly heard my angels say: "You are ready to go now. You must expand." The other vision was of a gate with a broad opening into what looked like the endless universe, with steps that I was supposed to be standing on. Instead I was away from that galactic door hiding under high threads of comfort sheets.My angels showed me they had placed an angel as a stand in until I got of my arse and stood at the gate again.....more on this later.
At that point my heart was beating with truth, as my ego tried it's hardest to talk me out of what I just saw.
"No. I LOVE Jasper. I can't go. My apartment.I t is so cozy.The people.I love the people. Finally I feel I have a niche, friends, everyone says hello, every-time I go downtown people want to talk to me..........." and a million other reasons of why I should stay in this bubble. You see, thats how ego speaks. It overrides all the truth of what your soul guides you to do. I this, me that ....Well it is a grand thing when you know how to override this voice and go for what your soul asks for. Feel the fear and do it anyway!
Since I was nine years old I knew I wanted to go live in Hawaii. I just had a feeling. A knowing that I was supposed to be there. I have never let fear stop me from trying things, so I had to dig deep and see what was really holding me here. Jasper will always be here. Things are continuously safe here.That is why so many people get stuck here. Not that it is not a beautiful place to live, but there is in fact a bubble here. A very think and densely protected one. It serves a purpose alright, but that is for another blog. Which reminds me that I better wrap this one up!
The point of this is to remind the soul about balance and action. It is always "safe" to stick with the same routine. It is easy to get caught up in a learning bubble, or in a safety net of patterns that become acceptable. Sure it is important to have a root and security, but when you come to terms with he fact that the root is earth, then you know that no matter where you go, you will create amazing opportunities,meet new people, interact with others who love life and inspire you. Everywhere you land is a place where you will learn, and teach. There are cycles that we come to close,dances we need to finish, lobsters we need to crystalize (and maybe consume) without guilt, to remember that it is important to stay aware. To expand the conscience outside of the place of comfort. To put the broken wings back on and fly free. To know that the power of our soul is with us no matter what and that only in expansion are we truly living.
We cannot dwell in the basement forever when the world is saying so loudly:
"Come back and play. We need you, yes, but mostly you need us"
So I am going to be a mermaid again. Where the waters are warmer, where an island is surrounded by salty water,where I know the grass is not actually greener, but it is remote, and full of opportunities just waiting for my expansion! Who knows where the next treasure is?
The angels do...but they wont tell me yet!
Patience and trust are two things amongst many others that I came here to see...and learn. I also found a part of myself that I was looking for. That part is going to be okay.I also have grown a deep appreciation for cheesy music.
So where is your soul calling for expansion?
Where is ego's fear holding on?
What are you going to do about it, and perhaps more importantly who can help you to get there?
We all need each other. If I can help you identify your perceived blocks please do not hesitate to make the call, or send me a private message and I will call you.
With lots of love and endless support.
I am typing two blogs at once here but I like this one for tonight.
Hope you are enjoying life in constant fearless expansion!
Signing off with a bit of Hot buttered soul and a beautiful painting by a friend of mine who inspired my last blog.
Yup. I am a very hope-filled romantic, with copious love to share withyall!
Keep on loving. No matter what my friends.